Love must be louder
Last Monday I was driving to our beautiful yoga studio in Harmer Hill, excited for a morning of sharing the things I love most in this world. The drive takes me about 20 minutes from my home on the opposite side of town (worth it for the picturesque views), and I’d noticed a number of Union Flags and St Georges Crosses crop up on my way. I didn’t give the thought too much of my energy - I had an uplifting class to create. But when I turned onto one particular road, I was greeted by an ocean of these flags, hanging from every lamppost on the long street, haring around in the wind.
I’ll be honest with you, it had me in tears. Immediately my bottom lip quivered, and the hot prickling tears hiding behind my eyes burst out. There I was, driving to teach a beautiful yoga event and enjoy a brunch with the dwtylife community, and at the same time people in my local community are feeling so lost and scared right now that they are choosing to act upon divisiveness and intolerance.
At first I experienced a deep sadness, then anger, then frustration that not everybody saw the world from my perspective. But after those emotions had sat for a little while I arrived into a new feeling. Strangely, I felt inspired.
If you’re blissfully unaware of the ‘deal’ with all the flags popping up around town and across motorways in the last fortnight, fair enough! I certainly don’t make a habit of listening to the news too often. But I am aware that the discourse around migrants and the more general ‘us vs. them’ rhetoric is rearing its ugly head (again), and the hanging of said flags are supposedly a symbol of ‘real English pride’.
The tears kept streaming down my cheeks, watching the many flags wave in the wind. Not because I don’t love the country I grew up in, or because I’m not proud to be British, but because in my heart I knew instantly hanging these flags was a choice made out of fear; a choice made to intimidate and unnerve.
One of the talking points in yoga is an idea and practice called Brahmacharya.
If you google it, there’s probably lots of emphasis on abstinence or even celibacy (which is a traditional interpretation of the Sanskrit term). But the intention behind Brahmacharya for me is awareness of your highest good, and awareness of your energy. The practice teaches us that harnessing moderation and balance is the key to encapsulating the crazy and paradoxical nature of the human experience.
It teaches us to be aware of where we’re directing our energy, and even where it’s leaking out of us onto things and focuses that aren’t meant for or serving our higher cause. It reminds us of our agency, potency and individual power. Which, when we have in tow, has the ability to move mountains - and importantly, create the change we’re desperate to see in our world.
Whatever your higher cause is, is up to you - I guess you know it when you find it. For me, it’s sowing and weaving as much love into this world as possible. I’ve come to realise that the fear and uncertainty driving hatred in the world right now is something that cannot be met with conversation. People can only meet you where they are. Arguing or trying to convince others to see things from a different perspective is utterly futile and a drain of precious energy if they don’t have the capacity to join you in true conversation. Conversations are built on curiosity, listening and understanding after all.
This doesn’t mean that I surrender to these harmful ideas though. Nor does it mean I can’t create change.
I was inspired on that morning drive to my yoga class because I realised, sat with those uncomfortable emotions, that what is within my gift is leading the way, and leading with love. Love MUST be louder at this time. Love must drown out the hate. Love must lead the way. Brahmacharya in action for me looks like letting the burning in my heart lead me towards a truer path. In that moment I remembered just how much power there is in shining a light on how life could be, living beyond fear and helping others to do the same too.
Those big emotions that hit me when I was driving served a purpose to me. They reminded me of the work to be done, the communities I feel called to serve, and the love that needs to be offered out to the world. At first, it can feel hard to share your light with people that see the world so differently - but they need it most, for they are still in the dark. Our job is not to discern who is and who is not worthy of our love and kindness, but instead to offer them out as widely and generously as possible. Only then can love overcome fear. Only then can we dismantle these harmful world views.
As difficult as the road may sometimes feel, love must be louder my friend.
I urge you to keep surrounding yourself with the people and practices that make you feel most loved. And then, let that light shine out of you like sunbeams, breaking through the clouds on a rainy day.
Ways to embody love (and practice brahmacharya) this week:
Engage and show a genuine interest in your servers, posties, and cashiers
Spend some time reflecting on what your values are, and how you can live in alignment with them
Avoid activities and people that deplete your energy unnecessarily
Seek first to understand, then to be understood
Use your anger as inspiration. Transform your frustration into loving action
Tune out of the thinking mind, and let your loving heart lead the way
Offer your loving kindness out to the world, and crucially, to yourself